Reflections from the season of giving 2005

As I was driving home tonight from spending the holiday weekend at my parents, and the kids asleep in the back of the car, I realized the true meaning of the season of giving (Christmas). For I received a lot of that giving this year, not that I really wanted to experience it, but looking back I am glad I have the family that I do have. Many years ago when my younger sister got divorced with a child much younger than mine now, my other sister and I bought some gifts and had one of her friends deliver them to her so my niece would have a nice Christmas that year. We all remember waking up to a nice Christmas every year at our house, and wanted to make sure that she had that as well at the time. A few years ago I got a nice bonus check, so I bought some stuff for the daycare and delivered them on Christmas eve to her, she was a single mom at the time struggling along to make ends meet with her daycare to support her. Well this year was my second year of Christmas as a single mom, almost 14 months since my divorce was final, and what a year it has been. It has been a struggle at times for me, but the kids always had clothes on their backs, and a roof over their head, and warm food in their bellies everyday. We were able to take a vacation this summer, it may have only been to the family cabin on the lake, but it still was a get away for awhile. Then Christmas comes along, and I have know idea what I am going to get them for Christmas, let alone figure out how I am going to be able to pay for it this year. I really did not want to use my credit card, it was already high enough from having my car worked on numerous times this year. Last year I got a Christmas bonus from work so that helped me through, but this year no bonus. My dad owns his own electrical company now, and my younger sister is practically his only employee, until she tore up her knee then a friend of hers and my dads helped him out for awhile until she got back on her feet. Well they had a Christmas party and mom invited me to go along, I think because she didn't want me staying home by myself that night. I decided to go, I think I pick up some supplies once for them anyways...:) We all had a nice time, I knew that dad was giving out bonus checks to my sister and the other helper, and my niece even got one, and I was ok with that, because I really was just along for the ride and a nice dinner at the restaurant. I was telling my mom at the restaurant that I really did not want to go shopping the next day because I had no money to buy Christmas gifts for the kids, and that was the whole reason for going shopping. My younger sister was going so she could spend her bonus money, and I really did not want to go. A week before Christmas and I have nothing for the kids. I spent the night at my parents house that night which I had not planned on doing because I had a meeting early the next morning and did not bring any clothes to change into for that. In the morning I got up early to go home and change before I met with my friend for a bit, before heading back up past my parents house to go shopping, nothing like a cross country adventure planned for the day. Well my mom wanted to ride with me while I met with my friend which was fine, and on the way down she hands me check and tells me that I need to stop at the bank before going shopping to cash it. The hardest thing I ever had to do was take that check! She says she and dad had been talking about giving me and my sister who got the bonus money this year because we are just a single income family. Whether that is true or not I do not know, my younger sister lives off of my parents anyways as much as she can, but that is a whole different story and probably a whole different blog of its own....:) So, the kids had a nice Christmas at my house. On New Years weekend my family had our Christmas that weekend. We draw names for stocking stuffers for the adults, and everyone pitches something in for the kids socks. This year we did not buy gifts for the adults, we donated all the money to charity instead, and just bought for the kids. Well my brother-in-law drew my name for stocking stuffers, and I got two gift cards in it, one was to a department store in my area that has everything in it, like Wal-mart but it was not for Wally world, and another one from a clothing store that I like but don't go there a lot, only when I need something nice at the last second to wear for some occation coming up. I had no idea how much they are for, but later found out that one of them is probably worth 3 digits. I was not expecting that answer at all, but apparently he got a nice size bonus check and that is what he wanted to do with it. This from a guy who is going to be a dad again this summer and remodeling to do before the big event. My heart was truly touched this year. I have given lots of years, and I guess, I just never thought I would ever be on the receiving end.