An Interesting Meeting!

The former spouse and myself had an apt. With the sprouts venting specialist, at her request. I told her to set up the time when he could be there. I was not going to set it up, that never works anymore. We discussed some of the issues the sprouts are having, he blamed the fowl language from the 4yr on me and daycare. Daycare maybe, but it is used in practically every sentenced that comes from him, but I just let it go. Was nice to have a third party run the show that had no ties to us. She just wanted to make sure that both households pretty much use the same discipline techniques as stuff like that. I was really and very nice meeting. I was not all that thrilled with having to have the time changed at the last minute to an hour later, but he did call me and ask if that would be ok. I told him I was not making that call he had to, if they could accommodate the new time, then I will be there.

After the meeting, I just had all this anger built up inside of me. I realized I was mad at him for not trying to make the marriage work. He never did anything that the counselors asked of him, etc. I realized that it was not about what he was going to loose in ending the marriage, it was what he was going to be gaining when the marriage was over. The list of gains is much greater than the loses, if the loses were really considered. You see he has gotten everything he has ever wanted in a year and a half after the divorce was final. So, it wasn't about me, it was about getting to be a farmer finally, and having the truck you always wanted, and the list goes on. This all clear to me when he called me to switch the appointment at the last minute. The excuse had to do with being a farmer, which his is third job, not his main job. I am not knocking farmers by the way, I grew up driving a tractor every summer, but it is different when you never set foot on a farm until 2 years ago. Anyways, finally realizing that it is truly not about you but other things is a big accomplishment I think.